Goodbye Robin. We'll miss you.

Hi all,

Hope you're doing well this evening.

The start of the morning was not a good one - I went in to work as usual, and everything was fine until Brian came and talked to me.

One of our coworkers had passed away on Friday night.

Nothing could have prepared me for that - I was in total shock and disbelief. The rest of the day I just felt numb. I wasn't sure how to feel. I wasn't really sure how to cope. I felt like my head was spinning. There were pamphlets handed out, offers of counseling, all of the normal corporate stuff. But I didn't feel like going to any of them. I wasn't sure what to say, nor what to do.

It's that whole "comfortable with my own mortality, but not anyone else's" complex that I have.

Maybe it's one of those things that you come to terms with as you get older. But that's the thing. She wasn't old. She was my age. Born in the same year even. I know everyone grieves in a different way. I guess I just haven't found mine yet.

She worked in the office across the street. Before lunch, everyone from our side went over and saw everyone. I felt awkward - Brian did most (all) of the talking.

And I had nothing to say. Nothing at all.

I guess I'm just not good at that kind of stuff.

I think many people were in disbelief. She always smiled when I talked to her, and she was always so pleasant. No one ever thought...

It's hard to imagine what she was going through, and even harder to think about what it came to. So many questions. But very little answers (for us, at least).

I saw her death notice in the paper today.

We'll miss you Robin. More than you'll ever know.

-Kirk